Mom caught me using the computer. I was just talking to my friend Abby on Facebook, and little did I know this would lead to work. She said, "Hey, if you can type well enough to talk to Abby, you can write a guest blog for me too. I'll give you a cookie!"
Silly mom. I'm so cute she should just give me cookies. Or bacon. There's too little bacon in our house!
Ewenity Farms in Florida.
Now when all that is sorted out, I want to share my best tips on waking up a human. This is an important job, and in my house it falls to me because I can jump up on the bed real easy.
I don't know what it is with humans and this urge to sleep in the mornings. I want to cuddle, go out, and have breakfast. In that order. Mom just wants to sleep and sleep and sleep! Seriously, we did that all night!
When I was new to this human-waking thing, I'd try to whine to get mom's attention. That didn't work at all. Then, I tried jumping up in bed and waiting for her to notice me. Major fail.
The best way is to jump up on the bed and poke your human with a paw. If he or she is a deep sleeper you might need to shake them a bit. Pretend you're poking a toy or something. It's fun, and it pays off!
When I poke my mom, she usually wakes up enough to cuddle with me. I let her enjoy my soft fur for a few minutes before moving to the next step: licking. Any part of skin that might stick out under the sheets should be properly licked. This helps humans wake up. If you can get to the face, it's a bonus.
If you have brothers or sisters or even a cat, this is a great time to get help. My brother Boo is really good at whimpering and whining, and I've taught him to start at the same time as I do the face-lick. My sister Bonnie doesn't like to jump up on the bed, it's a bit too high for her, but she'll stand up against it and help me poke or lick mom.
At this point, mommy usually grumbles something like, "It's a good thing I love you," and that means she's grateful for the doggie alarm clock service and ready to get out of bed. While she pulls on a robe and whatever humans need to go outside in the morning, I sneak in a nap on her pillow.
~ Topper GoodBoy